


Drive to survive

by mich_22wolves



Category: Women's Soccer RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Formula One, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-01
Updated: 2019-12-01
Packaged: 2021-02-26 01:33:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21635170
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mich_22wolves/pseuds/mich_22wolves
Summary: Racing drivers are a bunch of crazy maniacs, so how is Lindsey supposed to handle her affection for one?
Relationships: Lindsey Horan/Emily Sonnett
Comments: 2
Kudos: 42





	Drive to survive

**Author's Note:**

> Tried to combine my love for both soccer and Formula One. Hope you have fun.  
> P.s. English is not my native language so some sentences might be a bit weird.

When you first shook her hand, you never thought you'd end up here. In the pitlane in Baku, screaming yourself hoarse, and her looking up at you like she saw a ghost. Both of your cars are laying in the first corner of the Baku City Circuit, destroyed. And you can't for the life of you figure out how she could've let that happen. 

"Hey, I'm Lindsey Horan. It's nice to finally meet you." It's your first day of winter testing. As soon as you see Sonnett round the corner of the garage, you go over. Getting a new teammate is a scary experience, but you are determined to make this work. You've had all kinds of teammates through the years, and have had both good and horrible relationships with them. You know that you like to have some harmony in your team, you need it to perform well. "I know who you are. I'm Emily Sonnett. I hope you know that as well." You do. You have spent months leading up to this doing your research on her. Not in a creepy way. But you are curious to see how her racing is, how she operates the car, what her colleagues, bosses, and opponents think of her. After studying hours of material, you have come to one conclusion: Everyone loves her. No matter how often she beat someone on the track, she is best friends with them. 

You hang out. A lot. You rented an apartment for the pre-season in London, just like she has, and you spent the time that you aren't at the factory together in the city, showing her all your favorite restaurants, museums, and cafes. Some of your teammates were really nice guys, but you were never close. This is might be about to change though. You met her family when they visited her in England for the first time. She met yours a couple of weeks after. So when the season is coming closer, and you would usually move back to Monaco, you decide to just stay in London. Not permanently. And not just because of Sonnett. 

Your first race week together is a blast. Doing media was never your favorite thing, but with her by your side, you end up crying with laughter in almost every interview. You hug each other before you get in your cars at Qualifying, and you hug her afterward when she goes out in Q2. There is a lot of pressure on her, and you get it. She wants to prove them all wrong so badly. After the race, you hug her as well. Or she hugs you. Just before you wanna head up to the podium, she makes her way through the mechanics standing at the barriers, shouting your name. You can tell she is tired by the tone of her voice. Her smile is soft, not quite able to hide her disappointment after a mediocre race for herself. But her eyes still shine with joy, and even more when she meets your eyes. Your chest fills with pride. You make it your personal goal to see this after every race, but hopefully with her on the podium next to you. You wouldn't admit it to anyone, especially not her, but you keep your eyes on her during the entire podium ceremony.

She's getting closer to you. The car and she are getting along better, she has found her place in the team. The races in Bahrain and China show the world what Sonnett is capable of. "Not long, and you'll look at my cars ass at the starting lineup." She is laying on your bed, Saturday evening. You came out on top again. But barely. For the first time, she is staring right behind you. It does make you a bit nervous. Not because you think she will be better than you. You are just scared you are gonna fuck something up. Friendships in racing are risky. In the end, you are opponents, that you are on the same team does not matter on the track. Racing was always first in your life, but with Sonnett, you have found something special. 

It makes you even angrier, thinking back to yesterday's evening. You were so concerned about screwing something up. She seemingly wasn't. Cause she just did and now you are both in trouble. Not just that. You barely know what you are saying anymore, you know that you shouldn't do this in the pitlane, where all the cameras can hear and see you. Nobody is there to stop you. The mechanics are standing in the garage, trying to look like they aren't paying attention. Christian, your team principle, has already left the pitlane, either to calm down or to plot his murder of you and Sonnett. Sonnett, who still has not said a word to you. Your rage is wearing off. You are tired. Too tired to be looking at her shocked and scared face anymore. 

It's not like nobody is telling you. You just aren't listening. "You're being childish Linds. She has tried to call you like, 7 times. What are you waiting for." You don't know. You are scared. Every night you think about it. What an idiot you were. You never want to see that look on her face again. If anyone else had caused it, you would've ripped them apart. But you did. The reason why you aren't answering her texts, ignoring her calls, is because you are scared. Scared that she will decide you behaved like too much of a dick to repair what you once had. But it's easier to just pretend you are still pissed. She moved to late, you drove into her. It always takes two though. 

Sonnett gave up. And now, you miss her. When the ball was in your court, it was fine. Now you don't know where the ball even is. Maybe you kicked it up into space somewhere, and the both of you are left standing on an empty field. She stops looking at you. Even when she is talking to you. She has to, you are colleagues. Avoiding each other completely is not possible. It would also be wildly unprofessional. You hate to admit it, but Sonnett knows how to walk the line. She makes it clear that she doesn't want to talk to you outside of work, but is never openly rude. When asked about you in interviews she isn't thrilled. But she makes it clear that the incident is in the past and she had gotten over it. The first time you hear it, you laugh. She is ignoring you. How is she over it? "She is over the accident. She was the second the both of you left Baku. She tried to talk to you about it, idiot. And you ignored her. That's what she's mad about. You fucked that one up." Tobin is so right, it hurts a little. Now, when you lie awake at night, you dream of apologizing. Of just going up to her, telling her you are sorry. Then she smiles that cute smile of hers, hugs you, and you'll be fine. But you're too scared. Because if you go up to her, you put yourself out there. The ball will be back, in her court, and she could kick you in the face with it. Or nutmeg you and run away. You chuckle. You once played. In the small backyard of her London apartment. 

"When I was younger I wanted to be a soccer player. But I got lazy. So I decided to just sit in a car and make a career out of it." You laugh and are momentarily distracted, so she slots the ball through your legs and runs towards your makeshift goal. "And Emily Sonnett scores for Arsenal! She is straight on the road to being the top scorer this season!", she shouts, jumping around you. You are a little annoyed that you let her distract you, but the way the joy is radiating off of her, you can't help but smile along. On your way home, you make a quick stop. When you hand her the package the next morning, she is a bit wary. When she sees the Spurs logo, she looks confused. But as she turns the jersey, seeing the name printed on the back, she jumps towards you. When she hops into your lap, wrapping her arms around your neck, you can't help but think that making Emily Sonnett happy might be your favorite thing in the world. Next day, when you pick her up to go to the track, she is wearing the jersey over her hoodie.

That's the memory that makes you cry. Finally, after weeks of keeping it together, the reality catches up to you. You ruined something that made you so happy, made you feel like you had found THE person you clicked with. And you let racing get in the way of that. You wonder if it's too late. If she is now gone from your life. 

When you see her next time in the office, you decide to just try. What do you have to lose? Either, you keep having this distant relationship, you are unhappy and wonder what you could've done to save this, or you just bite the bullet and try to get her back into your life. 

It takes you a solid month. You are currently in Germany. You love the track, you love the crowd. Your Qualifying is fantastic. When you jump out of your car, waving to the crowd, already being approached by the guy doing the interviews. You are beaming. Then you turn around. The car with number 16 pulls up behind your own. Your smile gets even wider. You forget the past months of radio silence, you screaming at her in Azerbaijan, her not meeting your gaze for weeks. You are so proud of her. She deserves this so much. You remember Australia. Your dream of sharing a podium with her. It's so close. She jumps off her car. And then, she is stalling. She is slowly taking off her helmet. Her hair is just as messy as always, blonde flyaways all over her face. You can't help yourself. You go over to her, ignoring the microphone that was shoved into your face and pull her into a hug. She reacts right away. Buries her face in your neck and pulls you closer. "You deserve this so much. We will smash this tomorrow." You feel her nod. You don't know what this means. At all. But you have her back in your arms and it feels too good to be true. 

"Lindsey, this was an incredible weekend. P1. Have fun celebrating this one." Your first win of the season. This feeling, that you are experiencing right now, is why you love this so much. Everyone wants to be a hero in this sport and you just got your moment in the sun. But you'd love to know if you will get to share this. "What did Sonny do?" You haven't used that nickname in a while. It feels natural though, rolling off your tongue. "P2 for Sonnett." "WHOOO! WHAT A WEEKEND BOYS!" Now you are unleashed. You jump into the arms of your mechanics like a mad person. And when Sonnett pulls into her spot, you are sprinting towards her. She hasn't even pulled her helmet off. "Jesus, Lindsey." Her voice is muffled. But you can tell she is emotional. It's her first podium in Formula 1, the biggest stage in the world. When she finally pulls her helmet off, her eyes are the bluest you've ever seen them. You wish you could stay by her side. But you get pulled away for the post-race interview. You answer a bunch of questions about the race. "We just saw a tight embrace between you and your teammate. We all saw what happened after your crash in Baku. Have you moved past that?" Before the weekend, you would've cringed at the question. Now you are looking over the guy's shoulder, looking for Sonnett as you answer. "I've made some mistakes with handling the situation. Sonnett is a wonderful person and a joy to work with and just be around. Sometimes it takes a little time to figure some stuff out, but I've realized that it's better to just admit when you're wrong and move on with it." And her soft smile is back.

She gets handed her trophy and you get an idea. You wrap your arm around her waist and pull her on to the top of the podium with you. The smile she gives you is almost blinding. She gives you the same smile later in the evening when you kiss her on the balcony of your hotel room.


End file.
